Reflaction: Building a 'healthy professional mindset'

In this week’s podcast episode we discuss imposter phenomenon and the student mindset, two incredibly important topics as they can both be powerful influences on our self-care. Like many female therapists, I can relate all too well to both concepts but for the purpose of today’s blogpost I’ll focus on the student mindset.

As mental health clinicians our educational journey likely took anywhere from 4 to 10 years within the college or university setting. And, even before that journey began, I suspect most (if not all of us) had already been primed in the ways of the student mindset. You know, that mindset that enabled us to get into and succeed in university or college (overly focused on work, highly conscientious, constantly striving for perfection, holding unrelenting standards, and living with scarce resources like money and time). I suspect along with that comes the caregiver mindset but, alas, that’s a topic for another day.

Given the years that we’ve devoted to becoming mental health clinicians it’s only reasonable to expect that the qualities that enabled us to thrive academically would continue to exist long after we’re technically “students.” Now, don’t get me wrong, there can also be benefits to the student mindset, like the ongoing drive for knowledge and the openness to new ideas.

But it can also come with a cost.

When I was in university, the self-talk that helped me maintain the student mindset went something like this: “You can do this! Once you’re finished university then you can take time to do all the other things you want to do.” Worked like a charm! In fact, perhaps too well. Once I graduated and started my first job the self-talk went something like this: “You can do this! Once you’ve gotten used to this job then you can take time to do all the other things you want to do.” And once I “got used to the new job” there was always something else and before I knew it years had gone by and this self-talk was on a perpetual loop.

My wake-up call came one summer evening when I was sitting inside and working on reports. I glanced outside for a moment to enjoy the sight of my husband and bonus kids sitting around the fire roasting marshmallows. It put a smile on my face but quickly my self-talk kicked in “You can do this! Once you finish this report then you can take time to sit around the fire.” Of course, there was always another report and another report. Just as I was “student mindsetting” (yes, my made-up word) my bonus son came into the room and innocently asked me “Why can’t you come outside with us? It’s always so much fun when you’re with us.”

And that was the start of the end of my “student mindset” and the start of my “healthy professional mindset”. A mindset that maintains a love of learning and appropriate versus unrealistic, perfectionistic standards and makes room for aspects of myself that go beyond my therapist role and help me thrive in my professional role. You know, those parts of ourselves that truly keep us grounded and healthy.

Of course, after 10 years of university that student mindset hasn’t gone away quietly but with a healthy dose of self-compassion (after all it really thinks it’s helping me), it’s definitely become quieter. And it started with one small self-care experiment—not working on Friday evening and Saturday.

Where will your reflactions take you?