Reflaction: Beliefs that support our self-care efforts

In this week’s podcast episode, we have shifted our focus away from beliefs that can interfere with our self-care to beliefs that can actually support our self-care efforts. And while there are undoubtedly numerous beliefs that can aid us in our self-care, I want to focus on two personal rights that can often be related:

I have the right to my own needs for personal space and time.

AND

I have the right to change my mind.

If you’re a regular reader of our newsletter, you may recall some of my previous reflactions referencing my love of rural work and the wonderful position I held in this field for many years. This position enabled me to do work that aligned with my values and provided me with a work environment in which I could thrive (e.g., rural setting, multiple responsibilities, diverse clientele, travel, etc.).

However, as Dr. Marie-Helene Pelletier wisely emphasizes in her book, The Resilience Plan, and in our past podcast interview with her, this also left me vulnerable to burnout – as when we’re engaged in value-driven work we’re more likely to overextend ourselves due to the positive feelings that come with that. (Sound familiar to anyone?)

I enthusiastically took on various roles and responsibilities and even suggested additional projects along the way, all in the name of my value-driven work. All of this brought incredibly positive feelings and a sense of accomplishment.

But over time, the amount of time this took began taking a toll. And to be perfectly honest, I don’t think I even fully appreciated the extent of it until I started making some changes that I now realize aligned with me embracing my right to personal space and time. And although it was a learning process for me with several ups and downs, I do believe that embracing my right to personal space and time and my right to change my mind helped contribute to those times when I was better able to navigate this situation. Admittedly, however, at that time I may not have been fully aware of how my actions aligned with those rights.

Armed with a healthy dose of courage, I began approaching my position in a slightly different manner (right to change my mind about how I approach my job). Although my enthusiasm for my role remained and I continued to share my ideas, I also began acknowledging what was actually possible for me to do while also attending to my own needs for personal space and time.

Planning meetings offered me a particularly opportune time to share my experiences and to also enlist the support and guidance of the management team so that we could collaboratively identify realistic roles and responsibilities. Of course, because everyone was used to me eagerly taking on various tasks and roles it took time and reminders (to myself and others) about what was, in fact, realistic and sustainable. And, there were times when those familiar ways of working resurfaced and needed to, once again, be reigned in.

Thankfully I had courage, and perhaps most importantly, connections to a supportive group of colleagues and managers that helped, and continue to help me through this process and to a point where those old familiar ways of working don’t surface nearly as often (notice I didn’t say never surface). I’m now better able to chart a path that leads me to better work habits and correct it more quickly when it goes awry.

And as I often point out, like any good change, it didn’t happen overnight, and, in fact, it’s still a work in progress. And that’s okay.

Where will your reflactions take you?